I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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