Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize