There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
