Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
