OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
