I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I don't want my vagina anymore.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
