no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize