Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
