dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
