his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
i need some magic done to my vagina
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize