he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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