MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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