Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
