you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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