who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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