Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
