It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
