I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
