nutella sex= disaster
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
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