wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
