Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
