So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered