I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
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I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
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somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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