Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
