ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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