So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
