I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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