he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
