Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
