yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
