Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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