look no pants
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
