What did we do last night that was yellow?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
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dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
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I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..