There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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