Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Randomize
