Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Randomize
