I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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