u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
