She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
