I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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