I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
