Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
