I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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