I never want to see another naked old woman again.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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