i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
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i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
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Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Enjoy the penises
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize