Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
