I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
