I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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