I'm really into asian looking animals
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
