Well douche your snatch and let's go!
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Randomize
